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ट्रैफर्ड घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार सेवाएं आवेदन फार्म नौकरी का नाम: आईडीवीए (उच्च/मध्यम जोखिम) वेतन: £24,012 लाभ: प्रति वर्ष 33 दिनों की छुट्टी सहित एक उदार पैकेज, जिसमें बैंक अवकाश (एफटीई), लंबी सेवा के लिए अतिरिक्त छुट्टियां, 3% नियोक्ता योगदान के साथ कर्मचारी पेंशन योजना (रोजगार के 3 महीने के बाद), साइकिल 2 कार्य योजना, जीवन बीमा लाभ, 365 दिन शामिल हैं। वर्ष कर्मचारी सहायता कार्यक्रम स्थान: मैनचेस्टर अंतिम तिथि: रविवार 1 अगस्त 2021 साक्षात्कार की तिथि: गुरुवार 5 अगस्त 2021 (कृपया इस तिथि को नोट कर लें क्योंकि हम साक्षात्कार की तिथि को बदलने में असमर्थ हैं – यदि आप तिथि नहीं बना सकते हैं तो कृपया अपना आवेदन जमा करते समय हमें सूचित करें।) आरंभ करने की तिथि: यथाशीघ्र घंटे: प्रति सप्ताह 37 घंटे अनुबंध समाप्ति तिथि: मार्च 2023 तक निश्चित अवधि पृष्ठभूमि टीडीएएस एक स्वतंत्र स्वैच्छिक संगठन है जो महिला सहायता संघ इंग्लैंड से संबद्ध है। TDAS और जून 1990 से काम कर रहा है। TDAS गारंटी और एक पंजीकृत चैरिटी द्वारा लिमिटेड कंपनी है। टीडीएएस ट्रैफर्ड में एकमात्र विशेषज्ञ एजेंसी है जो वयस्कों और बच्चों और युवा लोगों को हस्तक्षेप और रोकथाम सेवाएं प्रदान करती है जो घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार का अनुभव कर रहे हैं या अनुभव कर रहे हैं। भूमिका का उद्देश्य समुदाय आधारित आईडीवीए और आउटरीच सपोर्ट टीम में एक अभिन्न और सक्रिय भूमिका निभाने के लिए। आप एक कुशल, बहु-अनुशासनात्मक स्टाफ टीम के हिस्से के रूप में काम करेंगे और घरेलू हिंसा/दुर्व्यवहार का सामना करने वाले लोगों को अपना भविष्य निर्धारित करने के लिए सूचित विकल्प बनाने के लिए समर्थन और प्रोत्साहित करने के लिए पहुंच योग्य और अत्यधिक प्रेरित होना चाहिए। आप उन सेवा उपयोगकर्ताओं के लिए समर्थन और वकालत सेवाओं का प्रावधान सुनिश्चित करेंगे जो घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार का अनुभव कर रहे हैं या अनुभव कर चुके हैं। एक सेवा उपयोगकर्ता के जोखिम का आकलन करना और जोखिम के स्तर के लिए उपयुक्त सेवा प्रदान करना। मुख्य कर्तव्य आईडीवीए सेवा का उपयोग करने वाले वयस्कों को एक व्यक्ति केंद्रित, आउटरीच सेवा प्रदान करें। यह आमने-सामने, टेलीफोन या अन्य डिजिटल माध्यमों से हो सकता है टीडीएएस सेवा प्रस्ताव को बढ़ावा देने और रेफरल/सेल्फ रेफरल को प्रोत्साहित करने के लिए एमएआरएसी एजेंसियों के साथ संपर्क करना। MARAC नीति के अनुसार और उपलब्ध संसाधनों के भीतर सेवा उपयोगकर्ताओं को सहायता प्रदान करने का सबसे उपयुक्त तरीका तय करना सेवा उपयोगकर्ता द्वारा SafeLives DASH जोखिम संकेतक चेकलिस्ट का उपयोग करने के जोखिम का आकलन करने के लिए और यह सुनिश्चित करने के लिए कि IDVA सेवा की डिलीवरी जोखिम के इस स्तर के लिए उपयुक्त है और किसी भी पहचाने गए जोखिम के वरिष्ठ IDVA को सूचित करने के लिए। बहु-एजेंसी जोखिम मूल्यांकन सम्मेलन ढांचे में भाग लें: ग्राहकों को संदर्भित करें, बैठकों में भाग लें और भाग लें और MARAC में सहमत कार्यों का पालन करें इस पद के लिए आवेदन करने के लिए यह आवश्यक है कि आपके पास सामाजिक देखभाल या शिक्षा में एनएनईबी/एनवीक्यू स्तर 3 या समकक्ष योग्यता हो। आपके पास संकट में युवा लोगों के साथ काम करने का कम से कम 2 साल का अनुभव और वयस्कों, बच्चों और युवाओं पर घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार के प्रभावों की जानकारी और समझ होनी चाहिए। आपको जोखिम का आकलन करने, योजना का समर्थन करने और सेवाएं प्रदान करने में सक्षम होना चाहिए। यह आवश्यक है कि आपको बाल संरक्षण और सुरक्षा की अद्यतन जानकारी हो। यह पोस्ट एक उन्नत डीबीएस के अधीन है। न्यूनतम योग्यता और अनुभव वाले आवेदकों पर ही विचार किया जाएगा। भूमिका की आवश्यकताओं के कारण, हम अनुरोध कर रहे हैं कि केवल महिला आवेदक ही आवेदन करें। कृपया सीवी न भेजें, क्योंकि उन्हें संसाधित नहीं किया जाएगा। कृपया कोई एजेंसी नहीं। कृपया नीचे एक आवेदन पत्र भरें और admin@tdas.org.uk पर ईमेल करें आवेदन फार्म Recruitment Pack

Learn about domestic abuse so that you have a greater awareness, understand the impacts of abuse, the legislation about abuse and how to get appropriate support for victims. ट्रैफर्ड घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार सेवाएं टीडीएएस पेशेवरों के लिए पेशेवरों द्वारा डिजाइन किया गया घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार जागरूकता प्रशिक्षण प्रदान करता है। हमारा आधे दिन का कोर्स उन पेशेवरों और स्वयंसेवकों के लिए है जो घरेलू शोषण के शिकार लोगों के संपर्क में आ सकते हैं या उनके साथ काम कर सकते हैं। पाठ्यक्रम के उद्देश्य और उद्देश्य: राष्ट्रीय और स्थानीय स्तर पर पीड़ितों और उनके परिवारों पर घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार के प्रभाव के बारे में चिकित्सकों की जागरूकता बढ़ाना ऑनलाइन दुर्व्यवहार और संभावित चेतावनी संकेतों सहित पीछा करने और उत्पीड़न के बारे में चिकित्सकों को जागरूकता बढ़ाएं चिकित्सकों को जबरदस्ती और नियंत्रण, अपराधियों द्वारा इस्तेमाल की जाने वाली रणनीति और इस तरह के दुरुपयोग के पीड़ितों की रक्षा करने वाले कानून के बारे में जागरूकता बढ़ाएं। बेघर न्यूनीकरण अधिनियम में हाल के परिवर्तनों सहित घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार और बेघरता के साथ इसके संबंध के बारे में चिकित्सकों को जागरूकता बढ़ाएं देखें कि हम, अभ्यासी के रूप में, घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार/पीछा करने और उत्पीड़न का अनुभव करने वाले और अपराध करने वालों के प्रति प्रतिक्रिया कैसे करते हैं और इसे सुरक्षित रूप से कैसे करें घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार के शिकार लोगों को उचित सहायता और सहायता प्रदान करने के लिए प्रतिभागियों की क्षमता बढ़ाएं, व्यावहारिक और भावनात्मक दोनों समर्थन प्रदान करें पीड़ितों और पेशेवरों के लिए विशेषज्ञ सहायता और सहायता कहां से प्राप्त की जा सकती है, इस बारे में जानकारी प्रदान करें, जिसमें पीड़ितों के कानूनी अधिकार, क्लेयर का कानून शामिल हैं अच्छे अभ्यास के मानकों को उठाएं पाठ्यक्रम पूरा करने के बाद, प्रतिभागी निम्न में सक्षम होंगे: जबरदस्ती और नियंत्रण, पीछा करना और उत्पीड़न, जबरन विवाह, सम्मान आधारित हिंसा और महिला जननांग विकृति सहित घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार और पीड़ितों और बच्चों पर इसके प्रभाव का ज्ञान प्रदर्शित करना घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार की सीमा और पीड़ितों और उनके बच्चों और परिवार के सदस्यों पर इसके प्रभाव का ज्ञान प्रदर्शित करें शरणार्थियों, आउटरीच परियोजनाओं, पुलिस, आवास, स्वास्थ्य सेवाओं और आपराधिक न्याय प्रणाली सहित पीड़ितों के लिए उपलब्ध सहायता की पहचान करें घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार के खुलासे का उचित और सुरक्षित रूप से जवाब दें प्रभावी अंतर और बहु-एजेंसी कार्य करने की आवश्यकता को समझें बीस्पोक प्रशिक्षण पैकेज भी उपलब्ध हैं। अधिक जानकारी के लिए कृपया हमसे संपर्क करें। अपना निःशुल्क स्थान बुक करें लोग क्या कहते हैं "मैं इस बारे में बहुत सोच रहा हूं कि कैसे मैं टीडीएएस का आभारी हूं और इसके बारे में मैं और बच्चे कितने भाग्यशाली हैं अब उसके साथ नहीं रहने के लिए।"

You can help TDAS. Get involved by fundraising for us, becoming a trustee, getting your business involved or volunteering. ट्रैफर्ड घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार सेवाएं टीडीएएस एक स्वतंत्र स्वैच्छिक संगठन है जो महिला सहायता संघ इंग्लैंड से संबद्ध है। TDAS और जून 1990 से काम कर रहा है। TDAS गारंटी और एक पंजीकृत चैरिटी द्वारा लिमिटेड कंपनी है। टीडीएएस ट्रैफर्ड में एकमात्र विशेषज्ञ एजेंसी है जो उन वयस्कों, बच्चों और युवाओं को सेवाएं प्रदान करती है जो घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार का अनुभव कर रहे हैं या अनुभव कर चुके हैं। बैंक अवकाश (एफटीई), लंबी सेवा के लिए अतिरिक्त अवकाश, 3% नियोक्ता योगदान के साथ कर्मचारी पेंशन योजना (रोजगार के 3 महीने बाद), साइकिल 2 कार्य योजना, जीवन बीमा लाभ, 365 दिन सहित प्रति वर्ष 33 दिनों की छुट्टी सहित एक उदार पैकेज की पेशकश वर्ष कर्मचारी सहायता कार्यक्रम और सभी कर्मचारियों के लिए प्रशिक्षण और विकास योजनाएं। ऊपर दिए गए ड्रॉप डाउन 'हमारे साथ काम करें' में नवीनतम अवसर देखें। Check out our latest opportunities in the drop down 'Work with us' above.

Tips on how to hide your tracks on the internet. How to ensure your abuser cannot see that you've visited the TDAS website ट्रैफर्ड घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार सेवाएं यदि आप चालू हैं इस वेबसाइट और इसे किसी से छिपाने की जरूरत है, पृष्ठ के शीर्ष पर 'बाहर निकलें साइट' बटन पर क्लिक करें और यह तुरंत एक सुरक्षित वेब पेज पर नेविगेट करेगा। यदि आप में हैं ऐसी स्थिति जहां दुर्व्यवहार करने वाला आपके ईमेल, कंप्यूटर और इंटरनेट के उपयोग को देख रहा हो, तो सबसे सुरक्षित काम यह है कि इस साइट को ऐसे कंप्यूटर पर देखें जो आपके घर में नहीं है। आप अधिकांश पुस्तकालयों में मुफ्त में इंटरनेट का उपयोग कर सकते हैं या शायद आप किसी मित्र के कंप्यूटर का उपयोग कर सकते हैं। यदि आप उपयोग कर रहे हैं आपका घरेलू कंप्यूटर, यथासंभव सुरक्षित रहने के लिए यहां कुछ कदम उठाए गए हैं। हर बार जब आप इंटरनेट का उपयोग करते हैं तो आपका कंप्यूटर जानकारी एकत्र करता है। यह जानकारी एक दुर्व्यवहारकर्ता द्वारा देखी जा सकती है और उन्हें आपके द्वारा देखी गई वेब साइटों को बताएगी। जब भी आप इंटरनेट का उपयोग करते हैं तो कुकीज़ आपके कंप्यूटर पर स्वचालित रूप से संग्रहीत डेटा के छोटे टुकड़े होते हैं। उनमें आपके द्वारा देखी गई वेब साइटों के नाम शामिल हो सकते हैं। यदि आप साफ़ कर सकते हैं कंप्यूटर से यह जानकारी, दुर्व्यवहार करने वाले के यह पता लगाने में सक्षम होने की संभावना कम है कि आप इस साइट पर गए हैं। कंप्यूटर से डेटा साफ़ करने में जोखिम शामिल हैं, क्योंकि एक दुर्व्यवहारकर्ता नोटिस कर सकता है कि क्या पासवर्ड या पता इतिहास साफ़ कर दिया गया है, और यह उन्हें संदिग्ध बना सकता है। यदि आप उपयोग कर रहे हैं इंटरनेट एक्सप्लोरर, 'टूल्स' पर क्लिक करें, फिर इंटरनेट विकल्प चुनें। 'सामान्य' टैब में, 'ब्राउज़िंग इतिहास' के अंतर्गत, 'हटाएं' पर क्लिक करें। यह एक और विंडो लाएगा। आप केवल अपना ब्राउज़िंग इतिहास, कुकीज़ या सब कुछ हटाना चुन सकते हैं। इस पर क्लिक करें और यह सभी ब्राउज़िंग इतिहास, कुकीज़ और पासवर्ड को हटा देगा। यदि आप उपयोग कर रहे हैं फ़ायरफ़ॉक्स, 'टूल्स' पर क्लिक करें, फिर या तो 'इतिहास' या 'विकल्प', फिर 'गोपनीयता', फिर 'इतिहास साफ़ करें' अभी या फ़ायरफ़ॉक्स बंद होने पर साफ़ करें। यदि आप उपयोग कर रहे हैं सफारी, 'इतिहास' पर क्लिक करें, फिर 'इतिहास साफ़ करें' पर क्लिक करें। इंटरनेट सुरक्षा के बारे में अधिक जानकारी के लिए, कृपया महिला सहायता वेबसाइट देखें और उनकी 'उत्तरजीवी पुस्तिका' देखें। उत्तरजीवी हैंडबुक

ट्रैफर्ड घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार सेवाएं We have a dedicated Victims Voice Facilitator, who facilitates and is responsible for engaging victims of all ages and diverse backgrounds, in order to gather feedback from those experiencing domestic abuse or are impacted by domestic abuse to inform future service developments. The need for this service has been identified under The Domestic Abuse Act (2021), where there is a duty placed on Local Authorities to launch a Local Partnership Board which will have representation of the voice of the victim and children and young people. The Victims Voice Facilitator role is to reach as many victims as possible, to be able to advocate for them and share their views at the Local Partnership Board, to enable their voices to be conveyed in their own words and/or support in victims attending the meetings. The victim’s voice is crucial in understanding what is working well in terms of the services available in Trafford and where there are areas for the development of services and information. There needs to be a variety of ways to engage with victims who would like to feedback on their experience of services in Trafford to ensure the service is accessible to all. An essential part of processing the impact domestic abuse has on a victim, is to restore a sense of control over their own lives. It is important to enable the victim to decide a place and time that suits them to feedback on services and therefore we are flexible in our delivery. Our service provides, community hubs, online surveys, feedback questionnaires as well as one to one sessions and we are constantly reviewing how to reach more victims to share their views. If you would like to get involved with the service or know somebody who would, please contact our team at admin@tdas.org.uk or call 0161 872 7368 to have your say This information is invaluable to assist us in supporting victims/survivors. Click here

Donate to TDAS. Give with credit card, debit card, regular gifts, paypal, donations Fundraise for TDAS TDAS simply couldn’t function without the support of our donors. Every pound raised helps people break free from domestic abuse. There are lots of ways in which you can support us. You could make a one off donation, plan a fundraising event with friends and family or even at your place of work, or take part in one of our events. No matter how you want to support TDAS, our fundraising team are here to help, please email fundraising@tdas.org.uk for help and support. DONATE Make a Donation Every pound donated helps people break free from domestic abuse. EVENTS Events See our upcoming events and sign up to fundraise. Friends of TDAS Join our volunteer fundraising group and raise money for TDAS. VOLUNTEER Corporate Fundraising Hold a fundraiser at your workplace or become a corporate partner. CORPORATES Organising your own event Get in touch with our fundraising team for help and support with your fundraiser. PLAN YOUR EVENT Wills and Legacies Leave a gift to TDAS in your Will WILLS Other ways to give See other ways you can support TDAS. GIVE Newsletters: January 2025 Supporter Newsletter

You can help TDAS. Get involved by fundraising for us, becoming a trustee, getting your business involved or volunteering. ट्रैफर्ड घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार सेवाएं टीडीएएस एक स्वतंत्र स्वैच्छिक संगठन है जो महिला सहायता संघ इंग्लैंड से संबद्ध है। TDAS और जून 1990 से काम कर रहा है। TDAS गारंटी और एक पंजीकृत चैरिटी द्वारा लिमिटेड कंपनी है। टीडीएएस ट्रैफर्ड में एकमात्र विशेषज्ञ एजेंसी है जो उन वयस्कों, बच्चों और युवाओं को सेवाएं प्रदान करती है जो घरेलू दुर्व्यवहार का अनुभव कर रहे हैं या अनुभव कर चुके हैं। बैंक अवकाश (एफटीई), लंबी सेवा के लिए अतिरिक्त अवकाश, 3% नियोक्ता योगदान के साथ कर्मचारी पेंशन योजना (रोजगार के 3 महीने बाद), साइकिल 2 कार्य योजना, जीवन बीमा लाभ, 365 दिन सहित प्रति वर्ष 33 दिनों की छुट्टी सहित एक उदार पैकेज की पेशकश वर्ष कर्मचारी सहायता कार्यक्रम और सभी कर्मचारियों के लिए प्रशिक्षण और विकास योजनाएं। ऊपर दिए गए ड्रॉप डाउन 'हमारे साथ काम करें' में नवीनतम अवसर देखें। Check out our latest opportunities in the drop down 'Work with us' above.

Jenny's Story I believe my husband has narcissistic personality disorder, the covert/vulnerable type. His mother had borderline personality disorder (a cluster B mental disorder condition) and she was diagnosed in the last 10 years of her life. She showed no outward sign of love or affection to her children or her grandchildren and was a very cold, angry and difficult woman. It’s no surprise that my husband is the way he is, given that she was his main caregiver. I was married to my husband for 20 years. There were a few red flags when I met him, but I was very naïve . I didn’t really realise how important these red flags were as I’d only had healthy relationships before that. I didn’t know a thing about personality disorders either; he was very high functioning and a high achiever, so it never crossed my mind that he could have a psychiatric problem. He wasn’t good at intimacy, close contact or even holding my hand but in the early days I just thought he was very shy. His moods were a big issue and they would go in cycles, from ‘ok’ to ‘difficult’. He would give me the silent treatment and manipulate me in covert ways in order to get me to behave the way he wanted. I’m very much a people pleaser so I was easy prey. As the marriage went on this was the pattern. So slow and insidious was this manipulation that I was not fully aware of his tactics in the early days. However, it all felt dysfunctional and I knew the balance was off. There were times when he was nice to me too so I was confused and too embarrassed to share it with anyone , especially as I couldn’t even articulate how bad it was making me feel. I was in a ‘fog’ most of the time, waiting for his kinder moments. We got married and on our honeymoon we had sex just twice. When we came home the sex completely stopped and I wasn’t allowed to question it – if I did, he would rage at me or give me the silent treatment again . I didn’t know what was going on. I thought to myself “Maybe he is gay and our marriage is a cover for that” but I kind of knew in my heart that he wasn’t gay. I now know that this was all about control , as well as a serious fear of intimacy and rejection. The refusing to have sex went on for many, many years and then he had a one-night stand with somebody. I found out because she rang his phone which I had at the time; mine was broken. When I found out he denied it and got really angry at me for even making the suggestion. He went to an STI clinic to get tested and I followed him and confronted him when he came out. Then he admitted it, which I didn’t expect him to do. He got so angry, a lot of drama ensued with the end result being that I could never mention it again and was given days of the silent treatment. I ended up apologising to him for questioning it too much, which is madness now looking back at it! What was I thinking? How did he manage to twist it to make himself appear the victim in this sorry scenario? My parents both became terminally ill and I said to him that I wanted to have children before my parents passed and that it was unfair to deny me children now, given their illnesses especially. I knew my Mum and Dad would love to see me with children before they died. Fortunately, he agreed. So we had sex on my fertile days… I had to pinpoint those days accurately and I did my research as I knew he might change his mind and I was desperate for kids. I got pregnant on those 2 occasions which I was thrilled about (and so was he!). The sex was functional but I got my babies out of it! He really loved being a Dad. For all his issues, in the pre-school years he was very attentive. He loved the attention they gave him. He was happier and a bit nicer to me, although we still had no sex life. As the children reached junior school age he started to say that he was losing them because they were growing up – and that’s when it got worse. He was very controlling of me. I had to do everything in the house. It all had to be done his way, he would constantly give me the silent treatment to manipulate me into behaving a certain way. I did what he wanted me to do in order to keep the peace; not wanting my kids to be living in a war zone. You just do, don’t you? You’ll do anything for your kids. When the kids were between ages of 7 and 9 they would say to me, “It’s not right the way that Daddy treats you”. I didn’t really understand because by then it was my ‘normal’. He was sometimes nice to me and he was highly intelligent so it didn’t really make any sense to me. I was on my own very much, as Mum and Dad had died by then. I knew it was dysfunctional but I thought “No marriage is perfect”. I loved him very much as well (crazy, I know!). It became more and more apparent and the kids started to say more. They were sometimes scared of him too – my son particularly. I started to assert myself more as time went on. He was getting worse and it really became quite bad. I started to realise that it was completely wrong the way that I was living. I’d look at other couples and would sometime hear a wife say to a husband something that I knew I’d never get away with saying. Even if it was something very simple and normal, like the banter of a normal, healthy relationship. So I started to think “What is going on here?” As I was starting to assert myself and the kids were growing up, it really shook him up. Things got even worse, the control got worse. It wasn’t that he didn’t let me out of the house, but if I did go out with friends he’d give me the silent treatment the next day; so it wasn’t worth the hassle of going out. It was easier to stay in and keep the peace. He liked me in the house and busy. He’d never tell me how to dress. He never really needed to as I’m quite modest, so he didn’t feel he had to control me in that way. He controlled the way I ran the house though. I had to pander to him. He wasn’t interested in what was going on in my world or in my head, it was all about him and he was constantly negative. He’d come in and moan about work, if I ever said anything about my day, he’d always bring it back to himself. He was utterly self-absorbed and I was really unhappy as things were getting worse. Life with him just escalated and at times he appeared tormented. His Mother had had a breakdown in her 50s and I thought that perhaps this was happening to him. On a rare sharing moment he told me that after work he’d drive to somewhere secluded to cry in the car before he came home. He even once said that his life would be easier if I died… he said it in such a matter-of-fact way too that I didn’t know whether to laugh, cry or run! I wasn’t even aghast at that point, I was just all over the place trying to manage him and to protect the children from all his unravelling. I decided to leave him finally after I realised that he had a serious and longstanding issue with porn addiction and that he had viewed it whilst sharing a family room with my two wonderful children . That was my epiphany and my motherly instinct to protect my children gave me the courage to stand up to him finally. I found an inner strength that I desperately needed. I also felt traumatised at this stage. I simply didn’t have the capacity to endure anymore pain from him. I wanted my life back and my children well away from this toxic environment. I didn’t want them to go on to have unhealthy relationships themselves or mental health issues. I took all of his tech devices away which he’d kept hidden and I hid them away myself. I felt on a mission but was in absolute despair as well … I realised I was married to a bully. We had no intimacy of any kind. He wouldn’t even hold my hand or sit on the sofa with me, never would hug me unless he was drunk and then after all these years I realised he did have a sex drive after all but he’d kept it all for porn! The last year before I left him was an extremely bad year, and the year before that had been bad one too, but not as bad as that final year. When I said the marriage was over he said he was going to kill himself. I was so strong though, I said “Don’t tell me, tell a doctor. I’ll take you down to the hospital”. We got in the car and I took him there. I never spoke a word or offered him any reassurance. I knew this was a tactic of his. We saw a lovely young doctor who told him it was probably a panic attack but I knew my husband was trying to get me back to being my usual submissive self. Because he was in a mess he admitted to the doctor “I’m selfish and I’m a bully, there’s something wrong with me”. He’d forgotten that I was in the room listening as he was in a bit of a state! I couldn’t believe that he’d admitted it after all these years. We left with anxiety tablets. When we came home he thanked me in a very insincere way and asked if he could come back to our bedroom (he had been sleeping in the spare room). That further proved to me that he thought his suicide threat would scare me. He thought that I’d give in and I’d revert back to being a timid wife and carry on with this farce of a marriage. I said “No, you’ll stay in the spare room and you’re never coming back into our bed. It’s over”. I was really firm. He said “It’s like you’ve died”. I told him “No, I’m re-born!”. I’ve never looked back from that. He started to unravel in the house. He stayed for another 3 months, the most awful 3 months. He was texting a woman right under my nose and the kids were aware of it all. He was really messed up. In fairness to him though he admitted to his children that he had psychiatric problems after he had a crazy night in the house . I know that was very, very hard for him to admit but I didn’t care about him, I just felt for my children. I gave him an ultimatum after 3 months as he was making no headway with moving out and was acting strange. I told him that I was struggling in a big way. He was unstable and I was stable and that, if he had any decency, he would go and leave me to be with the children so we could get our heads sorted. He listened and move out a few weeks after. I thought him going would help a lot but, as mad as it sounds, I was still madly in love with him and I was trauma-bonded to him (which I didn’t know anything about at the time). Trauma bonding is like an addiction that is a result of abusive relationships and intermittent re-enforcement. It’s seriously hard to recover from. I hated him so much but I loved him and ached for him. I was beside myself but I had to keep it all internally because of the children. I saw him in a car park once and I threw my arms round him! It was the hardest time of my life. One day, I’d just had a really, really bad day and I said to the children “Mum’s heading to rock bottom”. They were incredible and lay on the bed hugging me all evening. That night I decided to get some help. I went to see my doctor in the morning and I got some antidepressants and I also found a private therapist because I didn’t want to wait, I just wanted to get well. The pain was just too much. I chose a therapist who specialised in personality disorders and porn addiction because I knew he would understand the mind-set of my husband. The therapist was fantastic. He helped me with my trauma and explained about trauma-bonding. This helped me realise that everything I was experiencing was normal. He gave me techniques to manage my grief and it was so good to share the madness that was my marriage. The therapist suggested that I go to a domestic abuse support group. I hadn’t recognise that it was domestic abuse because my husband didn’t hit me. I wasn’t getting beaten up and also because my husband was a professional man. I understand now that domestic abuse goes across all social classes. In fact, my son said to me “Promise me he’s never hit you Mummy”, he’d assumed that because of the way he was treating me that he would have also been hitting me. At the time I still wasn’t clear how awful he’d been to me as I was still in this trauma-bond. I’d still remember the nice times. I’m still not over him yet, but it’s a lot better than it was. I contacted TDAS and about 6 weeks later I got a call to say that there was space on the True Colours course . I remember when I went on that first day I was saying to myself “I don’t think this will do me any good”. But I wanted so much to get well, to be free of the pain and to move on. I thought “I’ll do anything it takes to get free. My kids need me to be well” and this drove me forwards. It was great on that first day. I felt as such peace as everyone was in the same boat. We had quite different stories and different ages. Sandra and Sharan (TDAS staff) are just delightful, very warm and gentle people; which is exactly what you need. It was so different to my therapy, as you’re meeting people who you can share things with, other women. Even though we were all very different we were similar in having experienced the same patterns of behaviour and the abuse cycles. I started to recognise the cycle that my husband had. It was like a woman menstrual cycle in its regularity! I didn’t know about boundaries. I was so naïve. I’d lived in a bubble for 20 years where I had to behave myself all the time. I came out of the marriage like a young girl again who doesn’t know if she’s coming or going. The TDAS course was a real eye-opener and a good education. I did 6 weeks, I had to miss one week because of work but I didn’t want to miss it because everything I learned was really crucial to my wellbeing. All the things I was taught I listened intently to. Moving forward I’ve got to have a healthy relationship because I could find myself back in that vulnerable state again where somebody would take advantage of me. I know that I am easily manipulated, which I hate admitting. I’ll probably never meet another partner, as everyone has got a red flag! I met people through the course which was nice, on the last day of the course we all hugged and we created a WhatsApp group for keeping in touch; that was really good. I learned about all the different types of abuse, including emotional and financial abuse. I understood more about manipulation and what constitutes a healthy or an unhealthy relationship. I also did the TDAS Back to Me course which was a final part of the programme. That’s when I started to realise that I had control of my life now and I could move on. I started to feel positive and began making plans to socialise more and meet new friends. It covered a lot of things about self-love. I realised that I’d never understood the concept of self-love until then. I’d had to do everything for him and everything his way, so this was all new for me. I’m working on my self-love now. I’m currently reading a book that’s helping me to see that I am loved and that I do love myself; it’s so important. I did learn so much on the course. Everyone has a different story and can be abused in different ways. I had thought that everyone’s stories would be more similar, for example, some abusers are loving even though my husband wasn’t. I’d thought that all abusive men would be equally cold. Everyone’s story is unique. Something might lead to you questioning if you are being abused, for example if your story is not the same as the ones shown in dramas on TV or in documentaries. However, there are some behaviours that are more obvious and others that are covert. My husband was covert in his control. Many people would never have believed it of him, as he’s an intelligent man . I was always confused. He would say things such as “Think what I just said and what I didn’t say” and then he’d twist the meaning of things. I’d end up apologising for something that he’d done! He’d use mind games to massively confuse me. If I could count the times he gave me the silent treatment over the marriage I wouldn’t be surprised if it covered several months! My memory is not what it was, he took so much out of me. I was a really happy soul before I met him. I had the most wonderful childhood with the most amazing parents, it couldn’t have been a better childhood. Then I met him and he took away all that goodness; it’s like he sapped my soul with all the mind games and abuse. I’d have loved if I’d have read somewhere about the signs of covert abuse, then I would probably have looked at my situation and recognised it, but because he never hit me I never considered that it was abuse. I just knew it was dysfunctional but couldn’t work out what it was. High-functioning, professional men, there are lots of bad ones! It’s not just people from deprived backgrounds. He’s a dangerous man. He would have been the death of me, I know he would and I don’t say that lightly. He never had my back, never cared if I was out late or if I was on a long journey. I could never be unwell, he’d never let me be unwell. If I wasn’t feeling great I’d never say anything because he’d just make an unkind remark. His actions never matched his words. Compared to my parent’s loving marriage mine was the opposite. He’d talk about me externally or brag about me, but would never say anything positive to me face to face and he would knock my confidence constantly by rubbishing or not acknowledging any achievements of mine. TDAS was amazing for me, it really was. I felt better for it, I felt I’d moved on. I started a new chapter. I see healing as different chapters; there was the devastation of leaving him, the awakening to the understanding that I’d been abused for all those years, then I became depressed. Next was the trauma-bonding chapter (which was hellish), then there was the “Why?” chapter – “Why did this happen to me?” I wanted to understand, so I researched and read masses of information. I tried dating which was a nightmare because I needed to heal myself first. I needed to learn about boundaries. I was still very fragile and still easily manipulated. I know I need to work on myself first before I consider dating again. I don’t want to find myself in the same situation. I was a bit fascinated by the psychology of the personality disorder. Why my husband was the way he was. I still go to my therapist for support in getting through the divorce; it’s a way of looking after myself. He’s helping me to assert myself more and working on setting boundaries. I’ve said to the children that if they want to speak to a therapist they just have to let me know, so far they haven’t wanted to. My husband is very needy for attention. He make the kids feel bad if they don’t go and see him when he wants them to. He uses guilt-trips. My daughter doesn’t let him do this anymore and tells him to stop it. He does still try to manipulate them but now they’re old enough to deal with him, although I talk to them about healthy boundaries. They have their own phones so I don’t have to speak to him. I find it triggers me if I have to talk to him, so I keep away from him. No contact is how I will heal quicker. I’ve never badmouthed their Dad to them and I’ll never do it; it would only make the kids feel worse and their happiness is my priority. If I’m honest, I have been really tempted at times but thankfully I’ve managed. They’ll know that I am the stable one and that I provide a safe home for them. I encourage them to see him. It’s worked quite well so far, he is a good father. Of course, you can argue that a good father wouldn’t treat the mother so badly! I feel like I’m coming out of the worst of it all now. The kids are doing well, so I think I’m doing alright. They’re both doing fine at school. He took 20 years of my life, but I’m grateful for where I am now. I’ve got 2 healthy kids and I have the rest of my life without him. I’ve got so many plans and I’m working on myself. I’m building the new version of me. I’m showing my kids that I came out of that. That their Mum’s a strong woman. I want my son to find himself a strong woman and I want my daughter to be a strong woman herself!

Bernice's Memories of Advocating for Refuge Experiences in Housing since 1980 Before I was a Local Councillor I worked in another area as a Housing Manager for a Housing Association. I remember one occasion where a woman came into the office. It was a winter’s day and it had been snowing. She was in crisis. As she sat there talking to me, her eye was swelling up. When she had been out in the cold, the swelling had been suppressed, but as she was warming up her eye just began to balloon! She’d been hit by her husband during the night and had then been walking the streets until our office had opened. I talked to her about going to a refuge but she wouldn’t go as she was too frightened by the idea. Although I made the call to the refuge and encouraged her to go, it was up to her to decide. I couldn’t make her go. In those days there was much more stigma. Women didn’t feel able to admit it was happening. Perhaps they worried about being ostracised, bullied by others or not accepted. The situation was very bleak. I saw a lot of controlling situations where women were told what to do, didn’t have any control of the money within the household and weren’t allowed to take decisions. In the housing role we saw men who were violent and we’d make sure we didn’t interview them alone. There was one male tenant I remember who was certainly violent. Their families suffered. When I was a Housing Manager, we’d had a maintenance issue with the local independent refuge. The guy from Environmental Health was really unhappy about the circumstances, he said “I want you to instruct Environmental Heath to close this place down, unless something is done about it. I’m worried about the safety of these women. It is the only way to force the local authority to deal with the issue”. I had to say “This has got to change” and put myself in the position of being the bad guy. It was not a good place to be. For someone escaping violence, it wasn’t good enough. Making the leap to leave an abusive partner is a difficult and brave thing to do. Accommodation needs to be well maintained and safe. At the time, a refuge could be an uncertain place as the buildings were all just cobbled together. However, most refuges had little money to address problems . This background in housing set me up to understand the big picture of what was going on. Erin Pizzey started the first refuge in the UK, in 1971 so at this point Women’s Aid was still quite new. The Context of Housing Generally within Trafford in the early 90’s I became a Labour Local Councillor at a by-election in 1991. At that time, the housing function (which included working with refuges) was part of the social services remit. Housing was seen as an aspect of the welfare service that the council provided. Having worked in housing I could see that this was the approach; it wasn’t about standards of accommodation. I remember a male Councillor announcing once in the Council Chamber ‘You can take somebody out of Stretford but you can’t take Stretford out of somebody”. The idea prevailed that “I’ve done well for myself so I deserve to be wealthy, but you haven’t tried hard enough so you’ve got what you deserve. Which is why you live in Stretford.” Their attitudes were very patrician; “We know best” and “You live there so you are that kind of person.” Attitudes on domestic abuse fitted into this too. Domestic abuse was seen as a “lower class” problem. Something that doesn’t happen in “decent” families. At the time, there was no understanding either that a man could experience domestic abuse. I don’t think people asked for help when they needed to as there was so much stigma. Perhaps the woman I saw with the swollen eye couldn’t see herself as a victim of domestic abuse because she was middle class. It was a shameful thing to admit. Labour took control of Trafford Council in 1995 and the service was reshaped. At that point it became Housing and Environmental Services and it became about standards of all accommodation, public and private, rather than just social housing or ‘residual’ accommodation; a ‘poor relation’ to Social Care that received no investment and no-one bothered about much. It became part of Public Health, Cleanliness, quality of life, and the Environment – a much broader view. The Prevailing Attitudes in Society When I first became Chair of Housing and Environmental Services in 1996 a male colleague within the council told me “Watch out for these Women’s Aid people. They’re all lesbian, man-haters! Don’t have anything to do with them!” I was shocked at this attitude. So when we had the meeting with Trafford Women’s Aid (TWA)*, I didn’t invite him! This was the prevailing attitude. TWA had been absolutely kept at arms-length. Of course, some of this attitude was persisting due to a lack of women Councillors. When I became a Councillor there were not many women and I was the only one with small children. I was even warned that they did not want to see my children in the town hall! Having women in positions of authority and representation brought a whole different perspective to many things. At the time, instead of seeing a person who was having difficulties as a person who needed support, bizarrely they were often viewed as a threat! The idea that they thought that TWA were just lesbian, man-haters was very strange. However, because I had a background in housing management, I knew that domestic abuse was very important. I knew where TWA were coming from. *Trafford Women's Aid (TWA) was the previous name of Trafford Domestic Abuse Services (TDAS). Policy and its Effect on Refuge I had understood through the grapevine that there were issues to do with Trafford Women’s Aid (TWA). I was asked if I would organise a meeting with TWA and the then Director of Housing. We all sat down in the committee room, and I’d never seen the director look so uncomfortable before! I had heard that the relationship between TWA and the Council hadn’t been going well up to that point. In the course of that discussion I heard that women suffering domestic abuse had to prove it by physically showing their bruises or other bodily harm, and that they were obliged to get an injunction against their husband/partner so that he would leave the property. The woman had to stay in the same property with her children and they were not allowed to give up their tenancy. This, of course, meant that their partner knew where they were and would be really angry! This increased the risk to the women and their children. If the woman didn’t comply with either of these, they were deemed to be timewasters. Understandably, not many women put themselves though this humiliating and potentially dangerous ordeal. However, if a woman left and ran away, she couldn’t get housing benefit. Therefore, the women who did flee had no money. This was causing problems for the TWA refuge. The women staying there had no money to pay any rent, causing TWA to struggle financially. It was very often at risk of closing because of lack of funds. TWA were providing refuge, domestic abuse outreach in the community and a play worker for refuge children, all with very little funding. A Landmark Change Over the course of the meeting it was decided that women would no longer have to show bruises; they would be believed. Also, the local authority would support them to move to a safe place or to stay in the house; we’d support them to choose. If they decided to go to the refuge then their housing benefit could be transferred over and paid as rent to the refuge; setting TWA on the path to become financially sustainable. These decisions were made over the course of a half an hour meeting! The whole situation changed! Women would now have a place of safety they could go to, a confidential support service and the promise of a better life for them and their families. Looking back on that meeting, that hour. I don’t know how I was so calm! A lot of meetings you attend there’s a lot of talking and afterwards you think to yourself “Has a single person benefited from this discussion?” But that meeting was possibly the single most important meeting I ever had. The repercussions of the decisions we made were momentous. It’s not until later that you understand the full impact of the decisions that we took. It was a collection of circumstance that all lined up. I was part of making that change which is a great feeling. I remember in the meeting one of the women from TWA got a solemn promise from the director that no woman would ever again be asked to show their bruises. Until this point TWA had been kept at a distance. They had been ignored, with people refusing to meet with them and perceiving them as a threat. This meant that decisions had previously been taken in ignorance. Now the Council officers would work with TWA on a common agenda. I feel that speaking up in the meeting was the easy bit. Working with victims of abuse day-in-day-out is the hard part. I was there at the right time and in the right circumstance. Having my background in housing, I understood the issues and saw what needed to change. Due to the new split (housing being separate from social services) I got the role and had come into the role with a different view of what housing is for. It was serendipitous but it’s only when you look back on it that you see how everything came together just at the right moment! A Change in Attitudes By the time Cicely Merry became Mayor of Trafford in 1998, she chose TWA as her charity. She’d always championed it, but by then it was considered to be something the whole council could take on and support. There had been a whole change of opinion over the space of just a few years. You have to remember that in the 1950s domestic abuse was accepted. In the early nineties it was still tolerated. I remember battling against the view when I worked in housing that it was “only a domestic” with the police not wanting to get involved. That was the fight to change attitudes that was going on. I once gave a speech on Cicely’s behalf. I talked about TDAS and stressed that these women are not victims but are survivors. I thought this was very important, as they were still portrayed as victims. We need to be very proud of these women. Introducing Judith Lloyd to TDAS I was asked if I would join the TWA Trust Board but I was so busy that I knew wouldn’t be able to do it justice. So I asked Judith Lloyd, a person I trusted a lot to take this on instead and she’s been a board member ever since. Judith was busy but I knew that she’d get involved and would understand all the issues. She’s someone you can rely on, she will always do what she can and won’t let you down. Judith has made a big difference by being a trustee for over 20 years. Many thanks to Bernice Garlick for sharing her memories of advocating for TWA/TDAS, refuge and domestic abuse services in the 1990s.

TDAS is a team of specialist professionals skilled in supporting victims of domestic abuse. MEET THE TDAS TEAM! Samantha - CEO I have worked in the voluntary sector for over thirteen years and as a young person who needed support, I have always been interested in supporting people who may be facing difficult times. My journey started at fifteen years old when I began volunteering at a local nursery and youth club and this continued right through to my days at university where I became a volunteer-learning mentor for teenagers. I have a degree in Psychology and originally wanted to be a College Teacher but I quickly learnt that my love for direct support work would send me in a different direction and I haven’t looked back since. I am extremely passionate about service-user involvement and believe that their voice should be at the centre of all we do. This stemmed from my time as Client Inclusion Champion when I was a Project Worker supporting homeless women facing multiple disadvantage. I joined Team TDAS in 2010 as a Refuge Support Worker and since the day I walked through the door I knew TDAS was where I was destined to be. I feel extremely privileged to lead such an amazing organisation with amazing people providing amazing things to the families of Trafford. I am also a very proud Mummy and Step Mummy to two little girls and to Georgie the puppy. Kirsty - Services Manager I began working for TDAS back in 2011 as the Children and Young People’s Support Worker, as my career with TDAS developed my passion to offer support to adults and children continued to grow. I am truly grateful for being able to manage such an enthusiastic, dedicated team and love being able to support them in delivering our life-changing services. I love what TDAS stands for and how far we have come as an organisation in supporting adults and children effected by domestic abuse. Outside of TDAS I am a proud mum and step mum to two fantastic boys, family and friends mean the world to me. Anita - Services Manager Hi, I’m Anita. I am delighted to have taken up the temporary role as Services Manager with TDAS following my relocation from Europe, where I have lived and worked for the past 5 years. During my career I have been fortunate to work in a wide range of roles within a number of organisations where the focus of the work has ultimately been around enabling individuals to reach their potential to lead happy and fulfilling lives. I am looking forward to working alongside the TDAS team to continue to develop and enhance the direct support offered locally to victims of domestic abuse and their families within Trafford Borough. I believe in a strong team ethos and look forward to working with the current and future members of TDAS as well as partners organisations and clients. Kirsty - Business Development Manager Hi, I’m Kirsty. My role at TDAS is to develop the charity by making more people aware of the great work we do and getting them and their business involved. I previously worked in a senior role in digital advertising before moving into the charity sector. I love that TDAS is a local charity and that all the money we raise benefits people in Trafford. Those who volunteer or get involved in other ways are really impacted when they see the tangible improvements our work brings. Vanessa - Volunteer Coordinator Hi I’m Vanessa. I look after the volunteers who give their time to TDAS. I love working with volunteers and seeing the amazing impact that they have on our service-users’ lives. Volunteers make such a difference to our organisation and we are so grateful to anyone who can give their time to support the valuable work that we do. Before joining TDAS, I trained as a counsellor and supported men, women and young people who had experienced sexual abuse or trafficking. I have done lots of volunteering in my own spare time and I’m passionate about encouraging people to give something back to their local community. I have a soft spot for anything chocolatey and I love good coffee! Jayne - Finance Officer Jade - Services Coordinator Hi, I’m Jade, I am a mother of two beautiful children. I am the office administrator for TDAS and I love being a part of such an amazing charity that helps to support and transform the lives of victims of domestic abuse. I have seen first-hand how domestic abuse can affect people’s lives and from this it has gave me a strong passion to help those in need to access the right to be free and safe and to have the strength to create a brighter future for themselves. Amna - Finance Officer Hi, I’m Amna; one of the Finance Officers and have been working with TDAS for over two years now. My role covers the financial aspects of the charity, ensuring our yearly accounts are kept up to date. As a charity, it’s very important that all our financial statements are transparent, accurate and available for our stakeholders. Working for TDAS is such a wonderful experience. It’s so amazing to see how we make such a huge difference to those in need. Hi, I’m Jayne. I’m part of the Finance team. My role covers all the financial aspects of the organisation and I help ensure that our accounts are accurate and up to date. Up to date financial data and reports is hugely important to the successful running of the charity and our statements need to be timely and accurate so that stakeholders can be certain that the charity’s money is well stewarded. Working for TDAS, as part of a professional, caring and supportive team, is very rewarding. I am passionate about the work TDAS does. I love to see the difference to people’s lives that this organisation makes. TDAS Community Team Sandra - Domestic Abuse Advisor I have worked for TDAS as the Floating Support, Domestic Abuse Advisor for nearly eight years. I support the residents of Trafford who have been affected by domestic abuse and its effects. Every household I have supported has been as varied as is interesting. I have learned that domestic abuse matters to all of us regardless whether we have any experience of it. Tracy - Domestic Abuse Advisor Hi I'm Tracy. I am an outreach domestic abuse advisor. I have worked in the voluntary sector supporting those affected by domestic abuse for over six years. My role at TDAS is to provide face to face support and advice within Trafford community settings. I love the work that TDAS does and the variety of support services they offer. In a world where technology and social media advance and personal interactions are becoming more digitalised, I strongly believe it is vital to all suffering the affects of domestic abuse that they have the opportunity to sit down with a trained advisor and receive face-to-face support and reassurance. IDVAs We have 4 IDVAs supporting the team who come from a wide and diverse professional background. They are here to support anyone who falls within the high risk category following the DA risk assessment process. Lee - Domestic Abuse Advisor Hi my name is Lee. My background is holistic therapies in which I have over 20 years’ experience. I joined TDAS in August 2018 as a Domestic Abuse worker for the Supporting Change Service. Previously I worked for ten years for Victim Support as a Victim Care Officer and then later as Independent Victim Advocate. My role is to provide first contact and short-term support to those that contact our service via phone, email or face to face. I’m passionate about supporting individuals to realise their own resilience, so they become empowered to make positive changes in their lives. Sharan - Domestic Abuse Advisor My name is Sharan, I have three grown-up children and I have worked for TDAS supporting women and children for over twenty years. For ten years my focus was mainly on the support of children and young people specifically. I then retrained and worked in the role of an Information and Advice Worker. For the past six years, I’ve worked as a Domestic Abuse Advisor based at the refuge. I enjoy my role as no two days are the same and it’s fulfilling when you see the positive journey the families make. There’s lots of thinking on your feet and problem solving, but all adds to the sense of satisfaction when the positive outcomes are achieved. TDAS Accommodation Team Donna - Accommodation Team Leader I have been working in domestic abuse sector for five years supporting women and children who are living in refuge. It is a job I thoroughly enjoy and there is no greater satisfaction than knowing you have empowered a woman to take control of her life and move forward. I have recently moved to Manchester from the south and am loving the new challenges that my new role brings. Victoria - Domestic Abuse Advisor I am passionate about raising awareness of domestic abuse. During the past four years, I have worked alongside survivors to empower them to become more confident, resilient and independent. As a Domestic Abuse Advisor in the refuge my role is varied and often challenging but I am privileged to be a part of the positive changes in the lives of the families I support. Mary - Move on Domestic Abuse Advisor Hi, I’m Mary and I am a Move On Domestic Abuse Advisor. My role within TDAS is to support women who are homeless or at risk of homelessness to maintain their tenancies, prevent homelessness and to resettle into the community. I have over thirty years’ experience working with children and their families. My previous role was an Independent Domestic Abuse Advisor, I have supported those affected by domestic abuse to consider the options available to them and to develop safety plans. My role within TDAS is varied and every day I learn something new. I love meeting new people and building relationships with the ladies I am working with. Outside of TDAS I am a Mum to three grown up boys. Although they are no longer little, they still need their Mum which I love! Zile - Move On Domestic Abuse Advisor Hi my name is Zile. I have been working for TDAS for the past three years as the Move On Domestic Abuse Advisor. I am a qualified Social Worker with twenty years experience working in the voluntary sector. I have experience working in the following areas of work: welfare rights, mental health, children of prisoners, carers, prison service and children with challenging and behavioural needs. I have vast knowledge and experience of working with Black and Minority Ethnic Communities, addressing issues around discrimination, stigma, oppression and challenging stereotypes. I am able to communicate in Urdu, Punjabi and English. Amy - Complex Needs Domestic Abuse Advisor Hi, my name is Amy. I’ve worked in the domestic violence sector for just over ten years. I have enjoyed many different roles and currently work in the refuge. It is a privilege to be able to work with the families and so rewarding watching them grow in confidence and move on to live a life without abuse. I moved to Manchester from the Midlands around seven years ago and love it here. I have two little girls that keep me very busy! Emily - Volunteer Coordinator I have worked in voluntary sector for the last nine years. I enjoy helping and supporting people. I began by volunteering for a rehabilitation centre in Bury St Edmunds, which led to paid work as a Recovery Coordinator. I took this knowledge to Asia and worked in therapeutic recovery centre, whilst volunteering at Children’s Organisation of Southeast Asia preventing young girls from being trafficked. Volunteering at COSA changed my life and my understanding of the world. My compassion saw new depths and seeing the effects of neglect and sexual abuse on young girls showed me my next steps in life; I wanted to be of service, primarily to women. Having moved back to Manchester and wanting to support women, I’m very glad to join TDAS in the Volunteer Coordinator role. TDAS Children and Young People Team Amy - Children & Young People Team Leader Hi I’m Amy, I started working for TDAS is 2014 as a Children’s Worker over the summer in refuge. I fell in love with the work that TDAS does to support Children and Young people who have witnessed domestic abuse. I now co-ordinate the Children and Young People service and supervise our amazing Children and Young People’s workers, we have a fantastic service where children are at the heart of what we do. Often children and young people can be the hidden victims of domestic abuse and I’m really passionate about their voice being heard and breaking the cycle. Trafford Team Samantha - Children & Young People Support worker Hello, I am Samantha! Helping children and families is a big passion of mine. I am enthusiastic about making an impact which will have positive outcomes. My approach to my role is very passionate, child-focused and family orientated. My favourite positivity quote is: "Hope is a passion that burns the brightest!" Abby - Children & Young People Support Worker Hi, I’m Abby. I’m a Children and young people support worker here at TDAS, although I’m quite new I was brought here through a love of working with children and young people and a drive to help those affected by domestic violence. Previously, I spent five years as a primary school teacher and am about to gain my counselling diploma! I’m loving working with the team at TDAS and look forward to working with the community around Trafford. Jeanette - Children and Families Support Worker Hi! I’m Jeanette. I have been supporting children, young people and families up and down the country for many years. Life is hard, and every one of us needs extra support at different times in our lives. In my role at TDAS I have the absolute privilege of being in a position to offer some of that extra support- journeying together with families as they find hope, strength and resilience. Megan - CYP Support Worker Hi, my name is Megan! I have worked with children for almost five years, throughout a variety of different roles. My passion, for as long as I can remember, has been to work with children. I have experience working with children of all ages from working in the baby room of a private day nursery, to working for Thomas Cook as a children’s entertainer in Bulgaria! I now work in the TDAS Refuge as a CYP support worker, supporting all the residents through a variety of play, family and learning sessions! My role is to support the children and families to settle into their new home in the refuge, ensure they feel welcome and understand some of the big changes that have happened in their lives. Salford Team Jenny - Service Coordinator for Salford's CYP Service Hi, I'm Jenny, I joined TDAS in 2020 as the Service Coordinator for Salford's CYP Service; I'm a qualified Social Worker with over 6 years experience of working in the voluntary sector. I have managed and worked in specialist refuges for past 3 years, I recognise the detrimental impact that repeated exposure to abuse can have on an individual. I'm dedicated to being a part of the wider effort to break the cycle of abuse; particularly in encouraging brighter futures and more positive outcomes for it's often unseen victims - children and young people. My role at TDAS is to coordinate the set up and delivery of the Salford CYP service, to lead and supervise the CYP team and ensure the provisions of a flexible range of service for children and young people in the community who have experienced abuse. Reah - Young Person's IDVA Hi, I'm Reah. I joined TDAS in 2020; I am a qualified Social Worker and I am currently studying criminology and forensic psychology. I am passionate about working with people and getting the best outcome for them! I have had plenty of experience working in and around the community with people of various backgrounds. I will mainly be working with Young People ages 14 -18 in the Salford area. I feel it is important to care; listen and spread positivity. My favourite quote is; Beyond Fear; Lies Freedom! Tee – Trauma Informed Children’s Worker I believe every child deserves to grow up in a safe and secure environment; witnessing domestic abuse can hinder that possibility. Therefore I am passionate about working alongside children in identifying and addressing their needs. As a Trauma Informed Worker in Salford I am working in schools and the local community, empowering children and young people to thrive in all environments. Paige - Parent and Child Attachment Worker Hi! my name is Paige, I joined TDAS in May 2020, and my background has always been working with children for the past 10 years. I have a real passion for children, enabling them have their voice heard and their needs met. My role at TDAS is a Parent and Attachment Worker, I will be ensuring that families needs will be met and helping develop the happy and positive relationships that are so important for children’s development. Karima - Group Facilitator Hi, my name is Karima and I joined the TDAS team in April 2020. I completed my post-graduate studies in 2013 which focused specifically upon domestic violence with a theoretical and fieldwork emphasis. I have since been working in the voluntary sector and have worked predominantly with vulnerable young people and children in various settings. I have extensive knowledge of working with BME communities (BME women in particular) and I am also a fluent speaker of the Arabic language. My role at TDAS as a Children and Young Peoples Group Facilitator is to provide support to children and young people affected by domestic abuse.

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